Crush

Crush%20logoHas this ever happened to you: I mean, since 7th grade?

  • You spend weeks both anxiously and daydreamily anticipating seeing someone you so obviously have a crush on.
  • You finally see the object of your crush, and immediately lose all of the most beloved aspects of your personality (intelligence, sense of humor, ability to participate in small talk, basic friendliness–and did I say intelligence?).
  • You drink just a little too much wine at dinner since we all know how well alcohol works with loosening up one’s nervousness leading to the oh so wonderful thoughtless verbosity.
  • You are 90% certain that said crush is well aware of your discomfort and though he gentlemanly tries to ease your pain, it only serves to make it worse.
  • Either that, or he thinks you’re a ditz.
  • You spend the evening back in the hotel room both berating yourself for being so stupidly crushed and thanking yourself for not acting out in an even more embarrassing manner while in one’s cups.
  • You then blog about said crush hoping to exorcise it from your life, because, really, it’s irrational, immature, utterly unviable, and probably a sure sign of a perimenopausal return to adolescence.

But, I believe that is exactly the definition of a crush.

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8 responses to “Crush

  1. I think you need to pass him a note, or maybe writing his name on the cover of your trapper keeper 5,ooo times will cure you.

    It happens.

  2. I actually DID pass Louis Bernstein a note in 1st grade, (he recipricated with a Cracker Jack ring!), and in 4th grade I wrote Michael Kelly’s name all over whatever was the equivalent of the trapper keeper in the 1970s (he graciously allowed me to take his photograph: I still have it).

    I obviously was lucky then since neither crush turned me down. Not so lucky a few crushes in later decades.

    But, interestingly, I got over Lewis and Michael in short order. So there’s something to that, Dr. No.

    Thank you for your scientific advice;-)

  3. call up a radio station and dedicate “never gonna let you go” by sergio mendes to him.
    not that i ever did that. or make a scrapbook. *facepalm*

  4. yes the song was heard, BY HIS FATHER, who told me “I like that song too” after church next day. I should have thrown myself in an open grave at that moment.
    FAIL.

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